Complicated Recipes for not-so-very complicated people!
Beans on Toast:
Beans on toast is traditional served for breakfast in countries wot really like beans on toast for breakfast. It is also, however, served not-so traditionally for luncheon or afternoon tea in parts of the world that generally like beans on toast for either luncheon or tea. It is rarely served as elevenses or second-breakfasts because no-body really feels like beans on toast for the fore-mentioned elevenses or second-breakfast.
Making Beans on Toast:
1) To prepare the beans you must first purchase a can of Heinz baked beans then open them using a tin opener. Get an adult to do this for you as it involves muscle power, sharp objects and pink-fluffy tennis balls. Empty the contents into a microwavable bowl and put on full power for 2 minutes in the microwave.
2) To prepare the toast, bung two slices of bread in the toaster (traditional weapon of a randomist) and wait for it to pop up saying "look at me i'm toast!" and then laugh joyously
3) Put the toast onto a plate and tip on the beans.
4) taa daa!! You are an independent person! You are a chef!
Eggs on Toast:
Eggs on Toast is traditional served for breakfast in countries wot really like Eggs on Toast for breakfast. It is also, however, served not-so traditionally for luncheon or afternoon tea in parts of the world that generally like Eggs on Toast for either luncheon or tea. It is rarely served as elevenses or second-breakfasts because no-body really feels like Eggs on Toast for the fore-mentioned elevenses or second-breakfast.
Making Eggs on Toast:
1) To prepare the egg: It is most advisable to ask someone else to fry you an egg. That is, someone older and wiser, who actually knows how to fry an egg.
2) To prepare the toast, bung two slices of bread in the toaster (traditional weapon of a randomist) and wait for it to pop up saying "look at me I'm toast!" and then laugh joyously
3) Put the toast onto a plate and tip on the egg.
4) taa daa!! You are an independent person! You are a chef!
Cheese on Toast:
Cheese on Toast is traditional served for breakfast in countries wot really like Cheese on Toast for breakfast. It is also, however, served not-so traditionally for luncheon or afternoon tea in parts of the world that generally like Cheese on Toast either luncheon or tea. It is rarely served as elevenses or second-breakfasts because no-body really feels like Cheese on Toast for the fore-mentioned elevenses or second-breakfast.
Making Cheese on Toast:
1) To prepare cheese: Slice cheese. I ask you Geoffrey is this process really so complicated?
2) To prepare the toast, bung two slices of bread in the toaster (traditional weapon of a randomist) and wait for it to pop up saying "look at me I'm toast!" and then laugh joyously
3) Add cheese to toast and melt.
4) taa daa!! You are an independent person! You are a chef!
Sardines on Toast:
Sardines on Toast is traditional served for breakfast in countries wot really like Sardines on Toast for breakfast. It is also, however, served not-so traditionally for luncheon or afternoon tea in parts of the world that generally like Sardines on Toast either luncheon or tea. It is rarely served as elevenses or second-breakfasts because no-body really feels like Sardines on Toast for the fore-mentioned elevenses or second-breakfast.
Making the Sardines on Toast:
1) To prepare the sardines you must first purchase a can of tinned sardines then open them using a tin opener. Get an adult to do this for you as it involves muscle power, sharp objects and pink-fluffy tennis balls.
2) To prepare the toast, bung two slices of bread in the toaster (traditional weapon of a randomist) and wait for it to pop up saying "look at me I'm toast!" and then laugh joyously
3) Put toast on a plate a top with sardines.
4) taa daa!! You are an independent person! You are a chef!
Buttered toast:
Buttered toast is traditional served for breakfast in countries wot really like Buttered toast for breakfast. It is also, however, served not-so traditionally for luncheon or afternoon tea in parts of the world that generally like Buttered toast either luncheon or tea. It is rarely served as elevenses or second-breakfasts because no-body really feels like Buttered toast for the fore-mentioned elevenses or second-breakfast.
Making the buttered toast:
1) Purchase butter - this is vital so don't go an' muck this stage up you ninny!
2) To prepare the toast, bung two slices of bread in the toaster (traditional weapon of a randomist) and wait for it to pop up saying "look at me I'm toast!" and then laugh joyously
3) Place toast on a plate and spread with butter until a thin layer is formed - the layer should look thin and be generally layerish.
4) taa daa!! You are an independent person! You are a chef!
Fried tomatoes on toast:
Fried tomatoes on toast is traditional served for breakfast in countries wot really like Fried tomatoes on toast for breakfast. It is also, however, served not-so traditionally for luncheon or afternoon tea in parts of the world that generally like Fried tomatoes on toast either luncheon or tea. It is rarely served as elevenses or second-breakfasts because no-body really feels like Fried tomatoes on toast for the fore-mentioned elevenses or second-breakfast.
Making the Fried tomatoes on toast:
1) To prepare the tomatoes: Slice in half and fry lightly
2) To prepare the toast, bung two slices of bread in the toaster (traditional weapon of a randomist) and wait for it to pop up saying "look at me I'm toast!" and then laugh joyously
3) Place toast on a plate and arrange fried tomatoe halves on the top
4) taa daa!! You are an independent person! You are a chef!
CONGRATULATIONS!
YOU ARE NOW A CHEF. USE YOU'RE SKILLS WISELY AND TEACH THEM TO NO-ONE UNLESS YOU HAVE ANY SORT OF DESIRE TO TEACH THEM TO SOMEONE. WARNING: IN THE HANDS OF ONE WHO DOES NOT APPRECIATE THE FORE-MENTIONED SKILLS, THE ART OF COMPLICATED RECIPES FOR THE NOT-SO-VERY COMPLICATED PERSON SHALL BECOME LETHAL, DEADLY AND SOMETIMES EVEN FATAL.
gOod LuCK